Tuesday, October 23, 2012


You known that creepy feeling you get when someone's watching you? That's how I felt that day, standing in church, like someone was ogling a particular part of my body. Only this time was different.

The stranger stood there, unapologetic, mouth agape.

At this point I guess I should explain there is nothing particularly different about me.  No tattoos. No amputations. No birth marks. I looked down, mystified.

Suddenly she broke the silence.

"So... how far along are you?"

My belly.  Darn this shirt. I knew the sales lady was lying when she told me baby-doll style tops were back in. I weighed 108 lbs and somehow this woman thought there was a second human in there.

My face went hot.

"This is awkward," I stuttered, "but I'm not pregnant."

Apparently it was awkward for only one of us. And getting more that way by the minute.

"Oh," she said, "Well, I pray that when you do get pregnant, it will be the blessing of twins."

Now I was the one staring. At her. The blessing of twins? Who prays
that kind of thing for someone? What had I ever done to this woman?

I have never prayed so hard that someone else's prayer would go unanswered.

It's been a couple of years, and I have had one child. Singular. And I'm good with that.

But if being stared at creeped me out once, it does doubly so now. I'm pretty sure next time someone ogles me, even if it's a church-lady, I'm going to hike up my baby-doll skirts and head in the opposite direction. Meanwhile thanking God for the ONE beautiful baby that's mine...

Q4U: What awkward experiences can you write about? Tell us in the comments, or write and leave a link so we can read it!


  1. I have to do a sleep study next week, I was wondering now i could work that in?

  2. Yes, that was an awkward moment. I've experienced my share of awkward moments. HAve you ever heard of anyone accidentally hugging a person? Well I did and wrote about it. Check out the story if you're interested at

    Thanks for this post.

  3. Wow. Talk about a weirdo. Awkward experiences? I only have about two thousand of those. A week.

    My awkward experience had to do with thinking someone at church said they had an STD when in actuality, they had PSTD. I'll spare you the crushing awkwardness of it all. ;)

  4. I work with a a high school football team as part of my sports medicine major, so... Imagine enduring a two and a half hour bus ride full of man-jokes, man-sounds, and man-smells only to get to the opposing team's school and find that there's nowhere for you (the only girl on board) to change... EXCEPT... an equipment closet.
    I remember slipping into this closet literally praying that no one would need anything from it for a mere 30 seconds. I was nervous about it until I saw one of those rolling basketball rack things. I don't know what they're called, exactly. I grabbed that thing and rolled it in front of me (for a little extra insurance) and changed into my polo and khakis with a speed good enough for an actor changing for the next scene.
    The awkward part? Just as I was fastening my belt, one of the assistant coaches opens the door and finds me. I will never forget the look on his face. It was one of those "Oh my gosh. If I hadn't stopped to sneeze on my way to this closet, I'd have walked right in on this" looks.
    Just for the record, NOW when I have to change in an equipment closet, that coach is more than happy to stand guard outside the door. :)

  5. Hahaha... you ladies crack me up. Tonya, you could totally work that in.