The dude looks me straight in the eyes. "You are one confused child."
Not the words you want to hear when someone's evaluating your college transcript.
But how do you explain to a career counselor that despite dropping your major, you really had a legitimate plan? That you've dreamed about this plan since you were 5? That your heart hurts for kids who hurt? Kids in remote places? Kids who would otherwise never get medical care?
But your own body--oh the irony--refuses to heal itself.
10 years of autoimmune disease, and I can't believe it's turning out this way.
"I need to quit my major. Again." I almost spit the words.
Not the words you want to hear when someone's evaluating your college transcript.
But how do you explain to a career counselor that despite dropping your major, you really had a legitimate plan? That you've dreamed about this plan since you were 5? That your heart hurts for kids who hurt? Kids in remote places? Kids who would otherwise never get medical care?
But your own body--oh the irony--refuses to heal itself.
10 years of autoimmune disease, and I can't believe it's turning out this way.
"I need to quit my major. Again." I almost spit the words.
He doesn't even try to disguise the eye-rolling.
Three times in three semesters. Three strikes; I'm out. Three minutes of weeping in my mother's arms (how lame is that for a 21-year-old?) and I realize--I'm undone.
I know it's hard, Honey. You can go to college from home (whooppeeee!). You can major in communications. (A.k.a. Talking?)
And who am I supposed to talk to during these three years? My toothbrush?
Funny what changing your major to communications does to a person. I curl up in my chair at home. And I begin to communicate.
I write to kids who are struggling. Kids in remote places. Kids who Kids who might not otherwise hear the truth. Kids who... I realize... have been my God-sized dream all along.
Eventually I meet another writer. She introduces me to an agent. The agent introduces me to a publisher. The publisher introduces me to what's only the next step in this God-sized dream.
And once again--I am undone. That the giver of Dreams is not confused by the transcript. He simply rewrote it.
And if I have learned one thing through all of this, it is that His ways are higher. And in the end, He does all things well.
Three times in three semesters. Three strikes; I'm out. Three minutes of weeping in my mother's arms (how lame is that for a 21-year-old?) and I realize--I'm undone.
I know it's hard, Honey. You can go to college from home (whooppeeee!). You can major in communications. (A.k.a. Talking?)
And who am I supposed to talk to during these three years? My toothbrush?
Funny what changing your major to communications does to a person. I curl up in my chair at home. And I begin to communicate.
(Start a blog? Who does that?)
I write to kids who are struggling. Kids in remote places. Kids who Kids who might not otherwise hear the truth. Kids who... I realize... have been my God-sized dream all along.
Eventually I meet another writer. She introduces me to an agent. The agent introduces me to a publisher. The publisher introduces me to what's only the next step in this God-sized dream.
And once again--I am undone. That the giver of Dreams is not confused by the transcript. He simply rewrote it.
And if I have learned one thing through all of this, it is that His ways are higher. And in the end, He does all things well.
****
Reprinted from www.holleygerth.com.
Bekah Hamrick Martin writes about life, love, and God-sized dreams on her blog, The Bare Naked Truth. She also writes about waiting for the right guy in her book, The Bare Naked Truth: Dating, Waiting & God's Purity Plan.
Bekah Hamrick Martin writes about life, love, and God-sized dreams on her blog, The Bare Naked Truth. She also writes about waiting for the right guy in her book, The Bare Naked Truth: Dating, Waiting & God's Purity Plan.
Ah...I wrote a poem when I was 19 about crying in my Mama's arms. I had to dig it up when I saw what you wrote. :)
ReplyDeleteI love this post - God does indeed set the dreams on our heart, the dreams of HIS heart, HIS making, if we would just be still and listen...
Love this. Absolutely love it.
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